Finding my heart
by Moonpattern
Summary: A missunderstanding leads to problems, but will love win in the end? GS


Fic Title: Finding my heart (7,100 words)

Author: Moonpattern

Fandom: CSI

Pairing: Grissom/Sara

Date: November 2004

Feedback: I'll take feedback

Rating: (R sexual references/violence/mature subjects)

Disclaimer: ("This is not meant to be taken as true, I make no $$$ . . .")

Summary: G/S have some problems, but will love win in the end?

Dedications: Thanks to my friends Theresa and Amy for urging me on and the website people for the encouragement.

Shots rang out through the house. There was only one thought that ran through Sara's head, _Grissom!_

The scene seemed to be as normal as any other. Two DB, waiting on the coroner, collecting evidence, nothing was unusual, that was when everything changed.

They weren't in the house fifteen minutes when all hell broke loose. Someone, they were figuring that they were the perp, returned to the scene of the crime and started reining fire on the house. Sara was shot in the arm, she fashioned make shift tourniquet from her belt to stop the bleeding and wondered if Grissom was as lucky as she was.

The pain was fierce in her right arm, she was getting weak form the pain but she urged on to find Grissom. _What if he is dead? What will I do then? Why didn't I try harder? Jesus Sara, think positive!_ Sara guided herself through the dark house with her gun cocked in her good hand. Her had was shaking from the pain, but she didn't give up on her grip because she knew if the perp was still there, she would have to shoot him in order to save her own life. Sara didn't ever want to kill anyone with her gun, but if it was a matter of life and death, she would do what needed to be done.

Sara searched the house with no avail, she didn't find the shooter, and instead she found a wounded, badly bleeding Grissom. She reached for her phone and called 911 and rattled off the address. She knew the paramedics were on their way, but she hoped it wasn't already too late. She leaned down to see if he had a pulse; she felt a faint pulse and sat down beside him to hold him in her arms. She was now covered in Grissom's blood in addition to her own blood. She didn't care; she just wanted him to be ok. She wanted him to look up at her with those beautiful blue eyes and tell her that everything was going to be ok.

"Griss, Griss..."she choked out through the sobs, "Griss, can you hear me, its Sara, can you hear me Griss?"

"Sa..." was all he got out when his body went limp.

Oh God, was he dead? He couldn't be dead! Grissom don't die on me, you can't die on me, not yet, and I haven't told you that I love you.

Sara frantically started doing CPR, she was doing chest compressions when the paramedics arrived. They put the paddles on him and revived his faint heartbeat. A warm feeling fell over Sara, but she knew it wasn't over yet. He was breathing, sure, but he wasn't out of the woods yet. The paramedics placed Grissom on a gurney and put him in an ambulance. Sara accompanied him because she had been shot as well. She sat in the back of the ambulance holding his hand crying. _She hoped he made it through, he had to make it through, and he just had to!_

The hustle and bustle of the hospital made Sara nervous. She didn't even care about the bullet in her arm; she just wanted to make sure he was all right. They moved him to emergency surgery and she proceeded to surgery to remove the bullet from her arm. She was out for at least a couple of hours before she woke up. Her arm was bandaged and she felt like she had been drinking for a week straight and then abruptly stopped. She was sedated, she could feel the drugs running through her system but her only thought was Grissom! She frantically pushed the buzzer to alert the nurses that she wanted to know how he was. The nurse came to her attention.

"How is Grissom?"

"I'm afraid I cannot tell you that, miss."

"Damn it! Either you tell me, or I will go find someone who will. I was with him when he got shot, you have to tell me how he is, I need to know!" Sara was upset and the nurse could tell.

"Calm down miss, you promise not to get upset and I will tell you how he is."

Sara nodded in agreement.

"Mr Grissom is in critical condition, but he is stable. They removed three bullets, luckily they were only minor abrasions, the blood was worse than it looked, he lost a fair amount of blood, but miss, I assure you he will be ok."

Sara was a little bit less agitated she asked, "Is there any way I can see him?"

"He is still in ICU, but I will come find you when he gets moved to a room and I will see if I can get you in a room together, would that be alright?"

"That would be wonderful," Sara smiled for the first time in quite a few hours.

"You love him, don't you?" the nurse asked.

Sara was shocked. She thought to herself then said it out loud, "I think I do!"

"I knew you did, I could tell by the concern in your eyes, you feel his pain, I will keep you updated I promise, just get some rest miss."

"My name is Sara."

"Alright Sara, get some rest, ok!"

Sara nodded in agreement.

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It was a day and a half before Grissom got transferred to a room, but the nurse kept true to her word, she kept Sara updated and when he moved, he moved into Sara's room.

"Griss, are you ok?" Sara asked. Their beds were side by side, she was close enough that she could reach over and touch him, which she did frequently. She knew she had to tell him how she felt, but she wanted him to be coherent enough to hear her confession.

"Sara?" a soft whisper came from his lips.

Sara repeated herself, "Griss, are you ok?"

"I'm heavily drugged, but I think I'm ok."

"Can we talk...sometime..."

"As soon as I'm out of here, Sara, we will talk, I'm tired now, and can I sleep, please?"

"Sure Griss!" Sara knew he wasn't feeling quite up to himself, so she let it go. She didn't however, let go of his hand. She held it for what felt like forever.

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Sara was released from the hospital before Grissom. She went in daily to sit with him. He slept a lot because of the drugs for the pain, but she enjoyed just watching him sleep. She was so relieved that he wasn't hurt badly. The bullets braised his legs and he would have to have some therapy to be able to get back to work. Sara assured him she would be there, by his side, to help him with everything. She took a leave of absence from the lab, over and above the required recovery time to help take care of Grissom once he got home.

Sara was a wonderful nurse, she was so gentle with him, and he wondered if she missed her calling. It all made sense though; she was just as gentle with her job, and thorough. She was good at her job and she loved it almost as much as him, if not more, he just worried that he was taking advantage of her.

"Sara, are you sure you want to continue doing this?" He asked.

"Would I be here, Griss, if I didn't?"

"I just don't want you to feel obligated to look after me, I'm sure I could hire a nurse or something."

"That is foolish! I'm fine. If I didn't want to be here I would leave!"

Sara knew this was hard on him. He had one leg that he had trouble with and he hated being dependant almost as much as she did. She spent so much time with him, she basically moved into his townhouse for the time being, because it was easier then travelling back and forth. Grissom had a spare bedroom and she made herself quite at home in his house. The more time she spent with Grissom, the harder she fell in love with him. He was so different in the confines of his own house than he was at work. At work he had to wear the façade of being a boss, being in charge and not letting anyone in, at home, his home, he let her in, at least a little bit. The more she learned, the more she liked.

"Grissom, are you ready to talk to me yet?" Sara thought back to their conversation while he was still in the hospital.

"I'm not sure Sara, I have a good idea of what you want to talk about and I'm not sure if I'm ready for that, do you understand that Sara? I don't mean to hurt you, but I'm going through a lot, and if you feel you need to leave now, I will understand, I can't tell you I won't be upset, but I will understand."

"Griss, I'm not going anywhere! When you are ready to discuss this, I will be ready then too!"

Grissom reached for her hand, took it in his and gently kissed the back of her hand. Shivers went through Sara's body. That was all the reassurance she needed, she knew he had feelings for her and she was willing to wait until he could confess those feelings for her.

Sara stayed with Grissom to help him recuperate. When she was slated to go back to work, she felt as if she should go home, to HER place, to HER apartment, she was feeling confined within the house of Grissom.

Sara wanted nothing more than for him to return the love that she had for him, however she was certain that he would never do that. The events of the past two weeks had proven that to her. She told him she would stay with him and help him get back on his feet, he was up, walking, back on his feet, right? Sara felt an overwhelming need to run, run far away from Las Vegas and far away from Grissom. She decided that once she got back to work, she would give her two weeks notice to Catharine so hopefully it would be processed and never darken Grissom's desk. The less he knew, the better.

Sara decided she needed to retreat to a bath. She wouldn't bother to tell him, he was barely talking to her these days anyhow. She grabbed her big plush robe and retreated to the confines of his bathtub. She ran the water, added the bubble bath and sunk her tired body into the hot water. She lit a few candles and settled into the sudsy water. She put her headphones on and settled into her favorite CD. Her mind began to wander to that fated day...

_"Sara, can you please come here?" Grissom asked._

_Sara came running to his calls, just like he knew she would. She settled in beside him on the bed and wondered what he wanted. She looked up at him and chuckled, "You rang, sir!"_

_I was just wondering what you were doing, I was thinking about you, out there, all alone, minding your own business and I got lonely, I wanted to see your face."_

"_How many of those painkillers did you take, God Grissom, you are behaving like a drunk!" Sara got up off the bed._

"_I am drunk for you!" he slurred._

_Sara looked over at the opened pill bottle on the counter and took note that there were also some pills on the floor. "Grissom, Jesus, how many of those did you take?"_

"_I only took a feeeew!"_

_Sara picked up the pills and counted what was left, there was at least six missing, maybe more, and they were heavy narcotics that were only supposed to be taken every eight hours or so, not all at once, Sara got nervous. "Griss, you ok?" she asked. _

_He smiled, "I am greeeeeeaaattt!"_

_Sara ran and got him some water; she thought that maybe her would sober up with some water. She came back and he was fast asleep, passed out cold, so she lay next to him on the bed and eventually drifted off to slumber._

_Sara was abruptly awoken when a mouthy was covering hers. Her eyes came into focus and she realized that it was Grissom. She leaned down and pinched herself. "OUCH!" She thought to herself, nope not a dream, she wondered what was going on._

"_Ooh Sara, I love you," the kisses got more and more sensual, "Will you make love to me, show me that you love me too?"_

_Sara nodded in agreement, was this for real, she thought, who knows? Guess I should just go with it, she thought, and with that, she let go of her inhibitions and made love to Gil Grissom. _

_He was so sensual, he gave her the same attention he gave his work, he jumped in whole-heartedly. She was enjoying every minute, so was he, she could tell, she was nearly ready to let all of her inhibitions go when he abruptly stopped. What? She thought to herself, not now! SO close, not now! _

"_No!" she yelled._

_He stopped, got up and retreated to a cold shower. Had he thought she had meant no to his lovemaking? Oh shit, what was she gonna do now. She was angry, not to mention hot and bothered. She got up and walked over to the bathroom door, the water was running, she quietly opened the door and slipped into the shower with him, she thought she could maybe show him that she didn't mean no to him, the no was that she didn't want him to stop, maybe he would finish what he started. _

_Grissom turned around, saw Sara and abruptly grabbed a towel and left the shower and the bathroom. Sara was so confused, what did she do? Sara stood under the cold water, hoping it would release her tension, it worked for now, she just wanted to know what went on......._

Sara came back to present day and realized that there were tears in her eyes. It had been a long two weeks of grunts and silent treatment, she just wanted to leave and not look back. She had asked him constantly to talk and he just kept pushing her farther and farther away. She had enough. She decided that enough is enough!

She decided that she would go and tell Grissom that when she left for work, she was going back to her place. He didn't seem to care, he regarded her with a grunt.

Sara got dressed, packed up her things and left for work.

Grissom sat there on the couch in a fight with his thoughts, he thought back to that jaded day that jaded day that he hurt Sara....

He had taken a few too many painkillers, he knew that, but it hurt and he wanted it to stop, he called for Sara to come to his aid.

"Sara, will you come here?" He knew she wouldn't refuse to come to him. She would do whatever he asked, he knew!

She was so beautiful, she was so full of life, laughing and carrying on, making funny voices. She laughed, "You rang, Sir."

"_I was just wondering what you were doing, I was thinking about you, out there, all alone, minding your own business and I got lonely, I wanted to see your face." HE wanted more than that, he knew that, and she would find out soon enough. _

"_Jesus Griss, how many of those did you take?" She asked._

"_I only took a feeeew!" One, two, maybe a few...he thought to himself._

_He could see her fidgeting, picking up the pills and counting them, "Griss, you ok?"Sshe asked._

_He smiled, "I am greeeeeeaaattt!"_

_She left and he passed out, from what he remembered. He woke up abruptly with only one thing on his mind, he looked down at the tent under the blankets and looked over at his sleeping partner and began to proceed. _

_He reached over and covered her mouth with his; he loved the soft touch of Sara and how she felt. All of a sudden he heard "OUCH!" He disregarded her words and continued on his way, that was strike one! _

"_Ooh Sara, I love you," the kisses got more and more sensual, "Will you make love to me, show me that you love me too?" The words flowed out of his mouth, he didn't even know what he was saying._

_Sara nodded in agreement and he continued on his way._

_He was gentle with her, caressing her every curve, giving in to her every move. Showing her what she made him feel like. _

"No!" she yelled

He stopped, got up and retreated to a cold shower. HE couldn't figure out what he had done, why she wanted to stop, but he knew when someone says stop, you stop or it is RAPE, sex without consent. Grissom turned around, saw Sara and abruptly grabbed a towel and left the shower and the bathroom.

HE could not fathom in his head what he had just done, or almost done, what he was capable of. HE shook his head and brought himself out of his thoughts.

HE could not bring himself to think Bout what he ad almost done, to Sara of all people, he never knew he was capable of such things.

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Sara walked into Grissom's office with the resignation paper for Catherine to sign off on. She passed it to Catherine. "Cath, will you process this for me?" She asked handing the paper to Catherine.

Catherine looked down at the paper and slowly read it:

Supervisor of CSI nights;

I, Sara Sidle, am hereby giving my two weeks notice. In two weeks time I will vacate the premises and never return again.

Catherine looked up, "Sara, are you sure this is what you want?"

"Yes, don't bother to try and change my mind, I have made my decision!"

Catherine didn't know what to say, she was speechless.

Sara began to walk away and she turned back around, "Hey Cath, do you wanna keep this to yourself, I wanna let everyone know in my own time."

"Sure Sara."

Catharine looked back at the letter again and the phone rang, "Willows!"

"Catherine, Its Gil, I want you to process another two weeks of leave for me? I am not quite ready to come back!"

"Sure, Gil, if that's what you want, but I think you should know.." she got cut off.

"I don't want to hear about it, tell me in two weeks!" And the phone cut off.

"Damn!" Catherine scowled, "He would be even more upset when he found out about Sara." Catherine mumbled to herself and got up to tell them the news about Gil and to pass out assignments.

Everyone was already in the break room when Catherine walked in. "Alright everyone, Gil is off for another two weeks, so you are still stuck with me, here are your assignments." She said passing out papers to the crew. "Sara, you and Nicky have some bones in a river, Warrick, you and Greg and I have a DB over in an alley behind the Casino, I will meet you guys out front!" With that Catherine left.

"Come on Sar, we gots us some bones!" Nick said getting up from the table.

"I'll meet you out front, I just have to stop by the ladies room, ok."

"Ok, I'll meet you at the truck."

Sara nodded and got up from the table and ran to the bathroom. She huddled into a bathroom stall, put her head in her hands and cried. Oh my God, she thought, I am never gonna see him again! Maybe it is for the better, yeah Sara that's it, Its for the better, now pull yourself together, you have work to do! Sara got up, left the stall, and splashed some water on her face and left to meet Nick at the truck.

"Yook Sar?" Nick asked when she got in the truck.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking." She was silent, "You know Nicky, I actually have something I need to tell you, but you gotta promise you will keep it to yourself, ok?"

"Ok Sar, if that's what you want."

"Nick, I gave my two weeks notice today, I am leaving Las Vegas!"

"Sara, you're leaving? IF that's what you want to do, I will support your decision and keep it to myself."

"Thanks Nick, you are a real friend." Sara smiled.

"Sara, can I ask what brought this on?"

"I am not sure, lots of stuff, I just need to get away and clear my head, I just need to get out of Vegas!" Sara was crying.

Nick pulled the truck over and pulled Sara into an embrace, there was nothing sexual about it, just one friend comforting another, "Sara, are you gonna be ok, or do you need me to take you home?"

"Just gimme a minute, I will be ok."

Nick started the truck up and they headed to their scene. When they returned to the lab, everyone was already back. They compiled the evidence and realized the bones were not human, they were that of a canine, Sara thought back to the gorilla they found in the desert, she didn't like it when animals were hurt either.

The two final weeks of Sara's stay at the crime lab went fast; before she knew it was her last night. She had slowly told everyone about her decision to leave. They were all quite supportive of her decision, and no matter how much she protested they insisted on having a going away breakfast celebration on her last morning with them.

They all gathered in the diner, they had all pitched together and bought Sara a small gift; she took it and began to choke away the tears. She was sad she was leaving, but it was something she had to do. She just wished that things had been different. She got up and left and headed to her apartment.

Sara had been packing things up for the last two weeks; she paid her rent up for the next month and told her landlord that she would be back for her stuff. She loaded her luggage in the car, got in the driver's seat and popped a CD in the dash. She thought Sheryl Crow, Leaving Las Vegas was appropriate. The song began as she pulled her car out of the parking lot and headed for the highway. The course hit her hard:

_I'm Leaving Las Vegas_

_Lights so bright_

_Palm sweat, blackjack_

On a Saturday night 

_Leaving Las Vegas_

_Leaving for good, for good_

_I'm leaving for good_

_I'm leaving for good_

That was just it; she was leaving, but was it for good. She had given her notice, but Catherine told her just to take an extended leave of absence to see if she really wanted this. Sara had agreed, she was so confused, she needed to find herself. She was going home, because he dad always used to say "Home is where your heart is" right now she hoped that was true, because she felt as if she had no heart in her body.

The song rang out more:

_I quit my job as a dancer_

_At the Lido Des Girls_

_Dealing blackjack until one or two_

_Such a muddy line between_

_The things you want_

_And the things you have to do_

She wasn't a dancer, but the words still stung her already damaged heart. The song was nearly over:

_I'm leaving Las Vegas_

_And I won't be back_

_No I won't be back_

_Not this time_

That was something she couldn't decide...not yet anyway. Sara got on the highway and headed for home, to find her heart.

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It was Grissom's first day back after the incident. He just wanted to be alone in the confines of his office, he wasn't very chatty, and he passed out assignments and retreated alone to his office to catch up on what he had missed.

He looked down at the paper work on his desk, Catherine was good at this, she could do his job, and sometimes he wondered if she should be doing his job. She was much more of a people person than he. He looked down and saw a familiar scrawl on some paper. He looked closer and read what it said:

Supervisor of CSI nights;

I, Sara Sidle, am hereby giving my two weeks notice. In two weeks time I will vacate the premises and never return again.

Grissom read and reread the letter for nearly an hour. What had he done, this was his fault. He was so upset, he felt as if someone reached in his chest and pulled his heart out and put it before him. Now what Gil? What will you do now? He picked up the phone and called Catherine.

It wasn't five minutes and Catherine was in his office. Grissom had the paper in his hand. "What is this?"

"What does it look like Gil?"

"Sara is gone? Is she gone for good?"

"Originally she was planning on that, but I convinced her to take an extended leave of absence instead, until she figures out what is going on."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I tried, you didn't want to listen!"

Grissom thought back to the day that he called to tell Catherine he wouldn't be back for two more weeks, this was what she wanted to tell him. Damn! He was so stupid and he was the reason she had left.

"Do you know where she has gone?"

"She wouldn't tell us, she may have told Nicky, but I'm not sure."

"Has she left yet?"

"I don't know, Gil, ask Nicky!" with that Catherine left.

Grissom picked up the phone to call Nick, he asked him to come to his office when he got back to the lab.

"Nick, do you know where Sara is?"

"She left Grissom and I do know where she went, but I was asked not to tell you, you are an investigator, you figure it out!" With that Nick left.

Grissom sat there with his head in his hands. Ok Gil, if you were Sara, where would you be? He got up; perhaps he could find something out at her apartment, with that he left.

He climbed the stairs to Sara's apartment, he rang the doorbell, nothing, he knocked, nothing. Suddenly he heard a voice.

"Sir, if you are looking for Sara, she already left last night."

"Do you now where she went?"

"No, all she said was that home was where the heart is and she left."

With that, Grissom thanked the lady for her help and returned to his office to find Sara's personnel file.

He rifled through the file until he found what he was looking for:

_Next of Kin: David Sidle, Father_

_Address:_ _124 Campernon Road, Tamales Bay, San Fransisco_

Grissom thought, now what? What was he supposed to do? He didn't want to go to Tamales Bay because he knew she didn't want to see him and that was his fault. He thought, maybe another plant, it was worth a shot, it worked last time didn't it!

He reached for the phone book and found a florist that delivered and dialled the number. HE had asked for another Orchid but he decided that the card had to be a bit more personal this time. HE thought for a minute and then began:

_Sara,_

_I am so sorry for what I did to you. I am sorry I forced you to leave; I will never be able to forgive myself for what I did to you. I realize that this plant will never be able to reverse the damage I did to you, but I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me._

_Gil_

HE thought for a moment and decided that would have to do, he didn't want to sign it with "Grissom", it didn't seem personal enough. He gave the lady his credit card number and humg up the phone.

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It was nearly ten in the morning when the doorbell rang. David Sidle got up from his chair to answer the door.

There was a young man at the door holding a plant, "Sir, I have a delivery for a miss Sara Sidle, do I have the right address?"

"Yes, just a sec, I will get her for you."

Sara approached the door and took a look and didn't know what to think. She accepted the package and went inside and sat it on the coffee table.

"Is it from him?" Her dad asked

"Yup."

"Are ya gonna read the card?"

"I'm not sure, should I?"

Sara and her father were very close, he always knew how to mend her broken heart and pick up the pieces of her shattered life he looked at her, "How do you know what it says, dear, until you read the card."

Sara looked down at the card in her hand. She thought to herself, how did he find out...Nick! I am gonna kill him! She grabbed the phone and dialled Nick's number. HE answered immediately.

"Stokes."

"You are so dead!"

"Sar, what's wrong, what did I do now?"

"Why would you tell Grissom where I was?"

"I didn't!"

"Then how did he find me?"

"I'm not gonna lie to you, he did ask me, but I told him that he was an investigator, investigate it!"

Sara apologized and hung up the phone. She looked at the card in her hand. He found me on his own. She ripped open the envelope to reveal the card within, her eyes dripped with emotion as she read the card:

_Sara,_

_I am so sorry for what I did to you. I am sorry I forced you to leave; I will never be able to forgive myself for what I did to you. I realize that this plant will never be able to reverse the damage I did to you, but I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me._

_Gil_

What does he think he did? Oh My God! She thought back to that night, that torrid night! Oh my god! She had to call him and set things straight. Sara reached for the phone again and dialled Grissom's cell number from heart. It rang and then he answered.

"Grissom."

She was silent, didn't know what to say.

"Sara?"

"Grissom, we need to talk!" she choked out.

"When do you want to talk?"

"Soon, I think there has been a misunderstanding, can you come to Tamales Bay?"

"I will leave right away!" With that he hung up the phone and called Catherine.

"Willows."

"Catherine, you have to cover for me, I am going to Tamales Bay for a few days!" and he hung up the phone.

Tamales Bay? Isn't that where Sara is from, wait, Sara. A smile came to her face.

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Grissom threw a few things in a bag, locked his door and left for his truck. HE got in and turned the radio on for company. IT was some twangy country song, not really his style, more Nick's style, but he left it because the words hit home:

He knew how to reach me deep inside   
And he found a part of me I could not hide   
And we'd walk and talk and touch tenderly   
Then he'd lay me down and make love to me   
We built a love so strong and couldn't break   
There was not a road we were afraid to take

And we'd kiss all the way from Arkansas to Rome   
'Cause in each other's arms we were home sweet home

But he don't feel the same   
Since our lives became   
Years of bills, babies and chains

Home ain't where his heart is anymore   
He may hang his hat behind our bedroom door   
But he don't lay his head down to love me like before   
Home ain't where his heart is anymore

If foundations made of stone can turn to dust   
Then the hardest hearts of steel can turn to rust   
If he could only find that feeling once again   
If we could only change the way the story ends

And he may still come home   
But I live here alone   
The love that built these walls is gone

Home ain't where his heart is anymore   
He may hang his hat behind our bedroom door   
But he don't lay his head down to love me like before

He don't lay his head down to love me like before   
Home ain't where his heart is anymore   
No, home ain't where his heart is

When the song ended, Grissom sped up and headed for Tamales Bay.

He drove all night and arrived there late in the afternoon. He found the B & B ok and slowly approached the door. He felt like a teenage walking to the door to pick up his first date. She just wanted to talk, Gil! Get over yourself.

He reached and rung the doorbell. A older man answered the door, "You must be Mr. Grissom?" he asked.

Grissom nodded to the older man and he led him into the living room.

"I will go get Sara, I will be right back."

Sara approached him, came over and gave him a gently hug, "Grissom!" Her eyes lit up.

"Sara, Hun, I am gonna leave you two alone, if you need me, just holler." And the man left.

Sara sat down beside Grissom and took his hand, "Griss, talk to me, what do you think you did?"

"I.....Al...most...R" he couldn't get the words out.

"You what?"

"That night, when I took the painkillers....you said ouch first then you said no and I still went on, Sara I nearly raped you, there I said it!" He got up, with a look of disgust on his face.

"What? What are you talking about? You didn't rape me, it was nothing like that at all. First of all, I said ouch because I pinched myself to see if it was a dream, secondly, I said 'no' because I didn't want you to stop, Grissom I was enjoying myself, that was until you abruptly left and ran to the shower, I came in to tell you I was still interested then you ran out of the shower and wouldn't talk to me for the next two weeks."

Grissom was in shock. It was all a misunderstanding. He was so pleased that he didn't do what he thought he did. Deep down he knew he wasn't capable of such a thing, but now he had the proof.

Sara walked over and placed her hand on his cheek. She placed the other one in his hair and leaned in to kiss him. He resisted at first but then he gave in to her advances. He looked down into her eyes and saw love like he never did before. He kissed her once again, she broke the kiss to whisper in his ear.

"Upstairs, NOW!"

Sara grabbed his hand and led him up the stairs. She opened a door, threw Grissom inside and locked it behind her. They ferociously began kissing, and ripping at each other's clothes. They made their way to the bed and finished disrobing. Sara stood there in awe of the naked figure before her. She had always wondered what he looked like beneath those clothes. The last time they tried this they didn't get far enough to see anything. Sara finished removing her clothes; she did it slowly because she knew it would drive him crazy. He was aroused with her clothes on, now he was really aroused and he had no way to hide it. They began kissing and huddled in an embrace. Sara took the command lead and began kissing down his chest towards his treasure trail. He bucked under her touch.

"Now, now lover, I have only just begun!"

He blushed as she began kissing his lips again; he rolled over and put himself on top while he took over the lead. He began placing gentle kisses done her neck and on her belly. He drew a gentle breath in and approached her hot tresses. She bucked in anticipation.

"Now, now lover, I have only just begun!" he mocked her.

She was beginning to get frustrated. She rolled herself back over on top of him and couldn't take any more of the anticipation. She lowered herself down on him and began to rise and fall on his member. He rode her pains of elation and they crashed in ecstasy together.

They rolled over in a tangled mess and rested for a minute.

"That was," she was winded, "that was...amazing!"

"Unhuh." Was his only reply.

She leaned over and poked him with her elbow.

"Ouch, what did you do that for?"

"If this is what I missed when we tried this last time, you deserved that!"

"Point taken!"

He leaned over and started to kiss her again.

"Now, now, what do you think you are doing?"

"Making up for lost time!"

Sara liked the sound of that and gave in to his kisses.

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They awoke to a knock at the door, "Sara, Hun, are you ok?"

"Yes, Dad, what time is it?"

"Nine AM, what do you want for breakfast, the usual?"

"The usual dad, we will be down in a few minutes, I just want a shower."

"Ok Hun, I will see you in a few."

Sara started to get up and he pulled her back into the bed. She looked around the room and she figured she had better clean it up a bit before the housekeeper arrived. The mess from their lovemaking was very evident in their room.

"We have got to get up, why don't you take a shower with me?"

"I take that as an invitation?"

"I wouldn't have asked you if it wasn't!"

Grissom followed Sara to the bathroom. She turned on the shower and stepped under the water and beckoned for him to join her. He was all too willing to oblige. He joined her in the shower and she greeted him with a gentle kiss. She began kissing slowly down his chest, pausing briefly between kisses. It drove him crazy and she knew it. It was fully aroused by now and she headed south to greet his pulsating member. She began placing slow kisses up and down and gently fondling his balls; he was bucking under her touch. She began to hum, he had never before seen anyone do that before, he liked it and it was going to send him over the limit.

"Sara......sa...I." His orgasm crashed. He was panting, "Now that was," he was gasping for breath, "that was, I have no words for what that was!"

He kissed Sara and could taste himself on her lips. He placed his hands under her buttocks and lowered her onto his still erect member. She rode him to orgasm.

"This was quite the shower, I think we should get clean, what do you think?"

"Oh," he laughed, "Is that what a shower is for?"

They kissed and began soaping each other and rinsing each other off.

They got dressed and straightened up the room and headed downstairs.

"Yum, that smells great, dad, I'm starving!"

Her father looked at her with a knowing grin and passed her a plate of pancakes. He then passed Grissom a plate too.

"My dad," Sara said chewing and grinning, "makes the best pancakes in all of Tamales Bay!"

Grissom nodded in agreement.

They finished up their breakfast and retreated to the living room for coffee.

"So what do you want to do today?" Sara asked.

Grissom looked at her with a devilish grin.

"Keep it clean mister!" She jumped on his lap, "How bout I show you around Tamales Bay."

Grissom had a look of disappointment on his face. "Sure Sara, I would love to see your home."

She reached down and kissed his lips and moved towards his ear to whisper in it, "We will do what you want to do later, don't you worry about that!"

Grissom smiled and kissed her back.

Sara was excited to show Grissom where she grew up. He showed him the schools she went to, where her friends lived, where she hung out as a kid. She was just excited that he was there, holding her had and walking through her life with her. The last stop on her route was the graveyard. She wanted him to meet her mom. They walked towards a gravesite to the far left of the graveyard and she bent down to place the single rose she had bought on the grave. Grissom looked down and read the tombstone:

_Adele Sidle_

_1935-2000_

_Loving wife and mother_

Sara looked up at Grissom and she had a tear running down her face. He reached over and wiped the tear off her cheek and placed a gentle kiss where the tear had been. Sara stood up and placed her arms around his neck and kissed him back. They joined hands and walked out of the graveyard to return to the B & B.

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Sara lay in Grissom's arms after their last round of lovemaking and she looked up at him. "DO you know how much I love you?"

"If it is half as much as I love you it will always be enough."

She leaned in and gave him a kiss, "What are we gonna do when we go back?"

"So you are coming back?"

"Unless you want to stay here?"

"I go where you go, myluv, where do you want to go?"

"I want to go home, because my heart isn't here, my heart is in Vegas, at my new home!"

He leaned down and kissed her again and they fell asleep in a lovers embrace.

THE END


End file.
